stigma_vastu
Liisa
Liisa was very actively looked after and watched as a child, due to the high risk of health problems. The doctors advised her mother to keep Liisa safe and calm, which ultimately led to overprotectiveness.
Her grandfather, a former military officer, kept the whole family on a short leash, which was stressful for both his daughter and granddaughter.
Despite the fact that his daughter had long been an adult and independent woman and mother, he still strove to tell her how to live correctly, which led to conflicts. Previously, Liisa was afraid that in one of these disputes, someone might be physically hurt.
As a child, Liisa was taken to dance, figure skating, horse riding and English classes under the strict supervision of her grandfather.
Parents divorced when Liisa was 7 and a few years later her mother found herself a partner, whom Liisa was not ready to accept into the family.
At the age of 12, Liisa began a period of socialization, when she first had the opportunity to go on vacation to a summer camp. Earlier friends weren't a priority since she was a "busy" child. Liisa started going out with her friends, which was unexpected for the rest of the family, which caused harsh disputes with her mother, who was very worried about her daughter's health and safety.
At home, Liisa said, there was often an atmosphere of irritation. In addition, the new man in the family too strange to her in the beginning, which created additional negative feelings for Liisa. She constantly thought that strangers were being introduced into her life without asking her. The grandfather also added fuel to the fire by expressing his negative opinion about the mother's choices, helping Liisa's anger and irritation burn brighter.
In the 12th grade, nervous breakdowns began due to the fact that Liisa constantly lived according to a pre-planned program of her relatives without much choice. However, then a supportive young man appeared in life, who helped to look at life from the other side and act as she herself wants. Despite this, Liisa still went to study at the medical school, and not in the entertainment industry, as she actually wanted. With the changes in her life, Liisa's nerves began to loosen more and more, abrupt changes in mood, neurosis, uncontrollable hysteria and paranoia began.
After the first year, she decided to work abroad, which shocked her family. They were sure that she would not dare to take this step, as she had always been a domestic child, not looking for adventure. When they nevertheless realized that Liisa was serious, they began to hinder her in every possible way, suppressing her morally with the phrases “You will not succeed”, “You think about all nonsense”, “You will not fly anywhere” and “You will crawl back in a week back, and we will remember that we warned you ”.
This was a big disaster and stress for Liisa, because for her family support is the most important thing.
“When the family turns their back on you, it hurts and it's always scary to think that they might be right.”
Liisa still decided to go to another country for several months and did not regret it at all. After returning home, she decided to make decisions independently in the future.
The family, of course, was unhappy with Liisa's disobedience to her parental will, so they stopped helping her in every possible way.
When Liisa made the decision to live with her boyfriend, an even greater rage arose in the family towards her whole life. Liisa found it very difficult to endure such an attitude from her parents, which only increased the stress.
In her second year of study, Liisa started having problems with compulsive overeating. The reason was the intense stress from academic work and family relationship .
At the moment, Liisa is trying to cope with nutritional problems by focusing on activities what brings her pleasure - work, sports and hobbies.
“You should start occupying yourself with something other than food, you need to find something in life that can bring you happiness. And it is worth learning to react easier to everything that happens. Do not let anyone decide for you and do what you think is right. "